Back to Work

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The lure of a hot beverage, an adult conversation, no maternity bra, no mum bum and not having to baby wipe my leggings is an exciting adventure for an exhausted mother of three!

To achieve this tomorrow, some serious ground work on my part has had to happen and I am not talking about the grueling task of filling in job applications to sell your forgotten skills. I am talking about all the childcare arrangements I have had to magic up.

Fortunately for me one of my best friends has crazily and rather stupidly recently become a proper fully fledged childminder, and I bagged two spaces for two days a week! Sadly she did not agree to payment in wine, or even monopoly money! I tried! The other two days I being filled by Nanny’s. Not the posh sort, the related overexcitedly crazy sort for agreeing to look after their two grand children. And then rather madly my husband agreed to sort of watch the children on a ‘work from home day’, he has already informed me that he is dreading this, so we will see how that goes!

With childcare sorted, I have then started to feel pretty bad about my forever moaning about how hard it is staying at home all day with two young children and a school aged child. I mean its not all shit! I have started to question, is this the right time to return to work? Ruby is 9 months now and Maddox has just turned two? But I know I was never EVER cut out to be that stay at home mother. Its just not me. Both academically and socially I feel I have a lot to give, and staying at home I wouldn’t be the best mother, as I could never be content and happy. I realize that sounds really bloody selfish and ungrateful for there are many mothers out there where this is all they want or long to be.

But this is me, and this the kind of mother I am. As a mother of three I welcome the judgment like a fierce lioness, because I couldn’t really give to hoots what people think of my life choices! I always ensure my children are happy first, myself next and then the dog, oh and then the husband! I don’t always achieve it, but I am a trier!

I am starting work tomorrow for 5 mornings a week but its a term time role, so the relief of the summer holidays off with the children really sold it to me and also relieved some of my guilt!

For the feminist bone in my body, I have always wanted to be a mother that worked, and I always felt that having a daughter this is important to show her I am more than just a mother. I have always disliked the divisions that childrearing still portrays. I want Imogen and Ruby to have the freedom to make choices for themselves, if and when they become parents…..yikes what a thought!

So today I have completed ones, mount Everest of ironing which took 3.5 hours to complete. I have also realized why I don’t do this that often and the clothes live in an untidy pile in the corner of our bedroom. The answer is, 1. Because we do not own enough hangers to hang them all up on and 2. They don’t actually all fit in the drawers! How is it I have a wardrobe full of clothes and nothing to wear!

I already dislike how organized I have had to be this evening for my return to work, I’ve laid out all the children’s clothes, even mine! Don’t judge, but I have written three pages of instructions for the grandparents? You think that’s a bit much??!! Well in my defense, I had to include all the necessary’s didn’t I? Like what channel you can find Paw Patrol on and what ‘Trickle’ means and how if you cant find number two, he is behind the shed draining my water butt and soaking himself. I am helpful right? And a tiny bit anxious?!!!

I haven’t blogged for one whole month, because our evenings have slipped away and little Ruby has been going to sleep then walking up and then the dummy falls out and so on! I have been so busy doing I don’t know what, only to watch one episode of Downton Abbey and fall asleep on the sofa! So god knows how I will find time to blog about my week at work! I will however try! I will inform you all about how nice a hot beverage is and what good company real life adults are! Haha, wish me luck!!!