School Homework

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Who is it really for? Should children even have homework? The answer to those questions may depend on a persons circumstance, for example working parents and single parents may not have the time to complete additional tasks and also parents with literacy problems may not be well supported in order to complete homework with their child. I personally are neither strongly for or against homework, however this evening has made me reconsider, in whose benefit it is!

Since the start of school my daughter has been set homework once a week. It is set on a Friday in her homework book and must be back at school by Wednesday. In the first few years at school the homework would just be one piece of numeracy or literacy and now sometimes there is both or a project set. Like this week, my daughter has been given two weeks to complete a PowerPoint presentation or book about Crime and Punishment in either the Roman, Tudor or Victorian times.

Two weeks, phew I thought when I first read the little slip of paper in the book bag! The first week past and I thought, its ok we have another week! Until that new week begins and every evening I am saying to her “Right, let’s get some notes from the internet on the Tudors then”.

We have done this internet surfing/note taking for three evenings now, each taking at least an hour at a time, mainly because she is quicker at writing than typing so I made her take hand written notes! I’m old-fashioned and clearly a huge time waster!

I took this project to be child lead, so I asked Imogen what she wanted to focus on, she told me she would like to focus on the rich and poor Tudors and food and drink. So after three hours or more of note taking over the course of a week, an hour into the PowerPoint presentation, I go and check the slip of paper to see how many slides are necessary.

FFS! I read in black and white that the presentation or book must focus on ‘Crime and Punishment’. Balls, that’s four or more hours wasted of MY time, oh I mean hers, researching what is now pointless, needless shit!

After a lot of silent swearing in my head, and blaming her for not listening to the teacher when the homework was explained!!! I pondered all the excuses I could give to the teacher as to why the homework wasn’t completed. ‘Our PowerPoint crashed’, ‘We forgot to email it, we will send it tomorrow’, ‘The dog ate the computer’, ‘The brother chewed the computer leads’ (this is the most plausible excuse)….erm ‘Mummy is too busy blogging to help…’! Then I felt that lovely parental guilt, as she would be the only one in the class who hadn’t completed her homework despite giving her two weeks to do it!

FFS, I better crack on looking at the clock displaying now 6.30pm the night before AKA tonight!! After watching her painful one handed typing earlier I decided I could get this shit drafted faster than she could type a whole sentence, so I instructed her to play Barbie’s whilst I searched the internet for ‘Crime and Punishment’ in the Tudor times.

Alas, the internet is wonderful! PowerPoint presentations on teaching websites already completed! OH NO I DIDNT! To right I didn’t, I am not a fucking idiot! She is a teacher right who is marking, and she must know all the tricks! Two painful hours later I have completed the presentation with a little help from my sister for the whizzy fizzy bits.

So after four wasted hours for a topic she was never going to present to two hours and two adults putting together a presentation she hasn’t even done or read yet! Nailing parenthood right now! What a brilliant example I am setting!

No in fact, what I am showing her, is if at first you don’t succeed, TRY, TRY, TRY AGAIN! Also I must be showing her that if she becomes a student at university in later life like myself and her auntie, she doesn’t leave things to the last minute and if she does, she needs to keep going until its done!!

So thank you for this learning experience Mrs B. This evening I have learnt that I am uber fussy about all the text being the same size and font in PowerPoint, you must also trial out the slides as shit just slides in all sorts of weird directions and I would not want to be caught gossiping in Tudor times this would happen:-

  • The Brank, (the gossip’s bridle)
    The brank was a punishment enacted on women who gossiped or spoke too freely. It was a large iron framework placed on the head of the offender, forming a type of cage. There was a metal strip on the brank that fit into the mouth and was either sharpened to a point or covered with spikes so that any movement of the tongue was certain to cause severe injuries to the mouth.

brankwoman wearing a brank

 

I’m fucked! Goodnight readers, keep gossiping on my page if your brave!

 

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