Parent. Yep that’s me! Proud to wear that badge…well most days! Today was one of those days and it often happens on a ‘can’t be arsed to parent today…too fecking tired’! So today whilst realising after the school run I desperately needed to fit in a food shop (Ugh!) with three kids in tow, not at all ideal and usually extremely painful and avoided at all costs. But today was a must! I cant be going to the overpriced cooperative daily anymore otherwise it will be spam for Christmas dinner and not turkey.
After this horrendous task, which actually went quite well apart from all the unnecessary overpriced items I said yes too, we had to pick up daddy (hardly ever call him James) from the train station. So to save time, and washing up ; ) I choose to ‘treat’ the little humans to a much-loved Mc Donalds, oh and Mummy had one too! Purely so Ruby didn’t feel left out!
In the car park we passed a dad and his two children and overheard him loudly and proudly,shout “I said HOLD THE FUCKING BAG YOU IDIOT” really aggressively to his child (or so it looked like). Lovely I thought! My eldest straight away said “He wasn’t very nice was he mummy, did you hear how he spoke to his child?”, I quietly said “Yes darling” and then quickly made it into the ‘restaurant’!.
I looked around I thought to myself, I look like such a bad mum feeding my 18 month old a McDonald’s, so I thought fish fingers will make this look like a ‘healthier’ choice right?!! Pahha when I later text the picture (see above) of number two eating his fish fingers the other half text back “Give him a real boys dinner like a burger or chicken nuggets!”.He then proceeded to tell me that fish is a girly dinner?!! WTF Captain Birdseye doesn’t think so, and in case he hadn’t noticed, with that hairy beard he is most certainly male!
Whilst munching away and watching my 18, in fact I think he is 19 months now, I can’t keep up…well my one and a bit year old dance away whilst he is eating mostly ketchup I spot a family come through the doors. Well dressed and the children are clearly from one of the local private schools! (I can tell by the uniform!). I then didn’t feel so bad for feeding my children this shit dinner, if its good enough for them its most certainly good enough for me!
Later I thought, why is it we process these ridiculous thoughts based on not feeling like we are ‘doing it’ properly, or raising them ‘properly’. I mean, aren’t we in the midst of an obesity crisis!?. Really, I couldn’t give two hoots, I loved a shit dinner as a kid, back when a happy meal cost just £1.99 and the happy meal toy was fantastic plastic and never a book (stupid idea that is!). No one goes to McDonald’s to read.
So many moments I could think of when you feel, slightly inadequate as a parent or less than compared to ‘those’mums! I decided to comply a list of moments when this is so. Here it is.
Feeling wholly inadequate when:
- I rock up to a children’s birthday party when your child is sporting a ponytail and there’s some kid with the most time-consuming fancy plait which has blatantly been found on Pinterest
- I have a play date around another parents house and see the most wonderful displays of their children’s artwork which I usually stuff in a drawer
- My child gets the school bear and you look in the book of all the bears wonderful excursions, when you know this bear is lucky if he gets a trip to Morrison’s
- Its world book day and you notice that the winners only win because their costumes are beautifully hand-made and clearly have more thought put into them
- I visit my friends houses who always display pictures of their children in every room, when I may have just a few very old pictures up in one room of the house!
- It’s the end of the school term and I realise that my child has grown two shoe sizes yet I never went back to Clarkes to purchase some more! Whoops
I could go on, but I haven’t got all night! Share your less than/adequate moments on my Facebook page…cant wait to have a read.