Some days it really is easier to stay at home. The amount of crap you have to organise before you leave the house is ridiculous, not to mention it takes at least an hour to get out (allowing time to feed Ruby on boobie). The changing bag is the biggest bane of my life at the moment, every time I leave the house the bastard thing gets unpacked and repacked and packed again! Even then I forget the odd item (plug,plug yesterdays blog)! A changing bag to a toddler is like a captivating magicians hat, they always seemed amused and amazed by the things they pull out of it!
So today whilst ensuring I had packed the wipes this time, I went off to do another task and then came back to check again! Because I doubt that bag just as much as my own parenting skills at the moment!
It’s not so much the getting out of the house that’s a pain its the getting back in! When we arrive home from any trip out, even if this includes the other half, the amount of times I go to and fro from the rusty old banger I should look like Victoria Beckham, skinny as a rake (I however do not- don’t like skinny bitches anyways! More cushion for the pushing hubby says ; )).
A coat, a shoe, a lost hairbrush, some crushed up mini cheddars, a dummy (hate them but god they shut them up), Christmas cards, book bag, water bottle, changing bag (bloody hate that thing) oh and the children, not one but three all taken out of the car by ME! Then you open the door and dump all these items in the hallway and think fuck, I’m the only mug that puts this crap away. All I want to do its go from my car, just once, with just myself, maybe a handbag (what a novel idea, I seriously don’t know if I own any anymore!) get through the front door and sit down! Wouldn’t that be nice…I can dream.
To add to that dream would be a peaceful car ride home without kids but that is not going to happen for a while. Bit like my dream of owning a mini…I really want one of those bad boys, so small and nippy. I often see, glamorous, possibly single childless women driving around without a care (or so it looks like) in the world in those… I hate those bitches also! I am in the market for a new car, apart from my dream of owning a mini I really don’t care much for cars, possibly because I am a bit shit at parking.
When I first passed by test at 18 I reversed my very ugly green Matiz (nicknamed loaf of bread on wheels) into a stationary trolley park in Morrison’s! Since then I have never reversed parked not to mention parallel parked! I’m impatient and haven’t time to fanny about, especially with my delightful ‘quiet’ and ‘well behaved’ children in the back! So I have no idea what car to buy as my budget is more fisher price than mini cooper : (. All I know is I am never ready and never will be ready to drive a practical momobile.
Its Friday so I’m off to drink some vino and eat some more cheese, because its December and I eat more cheese in that month than any other!
Have a fabulous Friday evening, and keep liking and sharing if you like what you read!