Not the kinky type, hell no. Mind you the husband did jokingly suggest this when he came home at lunchtime to find I had successfully got two children sleeping at the same time (a rarity). I had just ventured into the kitchen, practically skipping because I knew they were both soundo and I had at least an hour of peace! I celebrated this occasion with toast and marmite, a cuppa tea, lemonade with a side of cake (party leftovers…obvs), oh and not forgetting ITV + 1 with 30mins left of This Morning. Totally nailing parenthood this morning.
I was feeling like one of ‘those’ mums, Id got up, got three kids ready, did the school run, took some embarrassingly overdue books back to the library and went to a baby group. Made a new mummy acquaintance too! Yep I’ll have the gold please. I sometimes don’t give the little gremlins enough credit, they weren’t at all little shits today, I mean sometimes they can be relatively easy! But don’t tell the husband that, because I need him to know everyday is hard and he gets it easy!
Some weeks are not even close to this, sometimes I’m climbing the walls on Tuesday feeling so tired and in denial that it’s not Friday. This week I am determined to make two more baby groups before the week is out, one to save my sanity some more and two because it tires my little energetic number two. Plus the husband has one ridiculously long day at work tomorrow, starting at 5am and probably not coming home until 8pm. Flying solo is shit, especially at bed and bathtime.
Most days I just need an extra pair of hands, I am always asked when I am out, “are you ok?”, “do you need a hand?”, “oh you have your hands full, don’t you?”. Followed by “whats the age gap?”, “don’t you own a telly?”. A fifteen month age gap was not planned, once we had baby number two, during those hell ish nights when you swear at each other, tell each other how useless they are and how much you f-ing hate them! Not just me right? We said no more kids, we are just having two!
Well surprise surprise Cilia, when number two was about 7 months old we found out I was pregnant, but having just stopped breastfeeding I had no idea how far I was! My first scan was uber clear and they dated me at about 15 weeks!! We both then spent the next 23 weeks in denial, completely unprepared. I just said lets just go with it, we will figure this out, but I felt terribly guilty for poor Maddox as he wasn’t going to get much time to be the baby.
My new fuck it attitude has been the best approach to parenthood so far, I’m not perfect, haven’t time to be, first time around parenting is filled with too much anxiety. I know that I am going to struggle with two young ones and I’m still not very good at asking for help! But let me get to Friday evening, where I have my eye on some Prosecco and chocolates from my birthday and my right hand man will be back to help me and my batteries will be recharged!
He isn’t that bad really! How do these single mothers and fathers do it, because its such hard work, not just the monotonous parenting tasks but the emotional support that parenting together can bring. If I couldn’t unload or vent to someone the moment that they walk through the door, whilst handing them a child I think Id self combust. Lone parenters deserve a fucking crown.
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